St. Simons 2010

We went on vacation to St. Simons Island two weeks ago and had a blast as always. Thanks to Branden's grandparents that have a condo down there we are able to go every year and have a wonderful time every year. Every year we take lots of bike rides, spend a ton of time at the beach, spend time at the boardwalk, play on playgrounds putt putt golf, swim swim and more swimming and eat lots of ice cream. This year I started morning dates with the kids and I would wake up with each one of them before everyone else and take them to get a donut and then go for a walk on the beach to get shells. This was a wonderful experience and a great way to take advantage of having Branden there to watch the other kids. They loved it and I did to. I see my kids in a whole new light when there are by themselves. I love it! This year was Finnians first year at the beach and he loved it! He spent a lot of time in the wagon he would sleep and eat in there on the beach and sometimes just hang out because he wanted to. I love our wagon! He was adorable on the beach he loved the water and loved to eat the sand. Annaliese and Tristan did not want to every come out of the water. They would stay in the ocean until we dragged them out. They loved catching waves on boogie boards and learning to dive through them with Branden. Branden is loving it because all he likes to do is play and have fun and now are kids are able to do that with him. They would call the big waves "big dogs" and the little ones were "little winkies". Don't know who came up with the names but by the end of the week we were trying to go to the beach at the perfect time to catch the big dogs. We also flew Brandens kite made sand castle on the beach and big deep holes. The kids love making moats and every year we make a monkey town USA. Oh and Gavin not the biggest fan of the water, but so good when we were out there. All he wanted to do was eat when we were at the beach.

Standing in Line

So I met a woman that was concerned bc Tristan was not going to school he would not learn the basic things like standing/walking in a line. It occurred to me the other day during morning mass he will learn how to stand in a line (don't know how much that matters), but the line he must learn to follow leads to Christ not the music room or recess or the bathroom. The discipline formed when walking in a line would be the same except for the fact you must keep proper distance from the people in front of you during mass and you must keep praying hands as you walk in the line. I think that is way harder and the discipline formed when walking in line during mass I think may be more of a formation of the will than being in line at school going from place to place.

Love is a choice

A priest I know once said in couseling a couple. Love is a choice, choose it, choose to love, now go and choose to love your spouse! If you think it will be easy you are wrong and will set yourself up for failure if you think you can fix all the brokenness sin brings in X amount of days and thats all you have to give then you are measuring and love doesn't measure love doesn't count the cost!

A friend of mine this past weekend told me there was a study done and in long standing marriages there had to be a 5 to 1 ratio of positive interactions vs negative interactions for a lasting marriage. 5 to 1! Yikes I am already needing to make up about 50 positive interactions for this day alone!

Most probably know this, but 50% of Americans get divorced! 17% are divorced due to infidelity. It is so sad there is so much brokenness and for those of you who are still married whether happily or struggling keep it up keep being a witness to love for the world. Marriage is so stink-in hard. Every day it can be grueling and you throw the stress of kids and finances in the mix and man o man some days seem so long. It is hard because it is supposed to be hard it is your vocation your path to heaven. Don't give up and don't lose hope and don't lose hope because you must give the world hope! Two couples I admire probably the most for their amazing marriages have gone through some of the most crummy hard times from financial hardships to the extreme of infidelity. They have come out of the other side of some great sufferings and have marriages that I admire. Pray for your spouse pray a lot for your spouse and their fidelity and their purity of heart. You better bet if you have something amazing to offer the world (a marriage that lasts a lifetime)it will be attacked and God will not will it but will allow it to happen in order to give you the opportunity to strengthen you and your marriage.
In directing guiding someone in choosing a spouse I read this cool passage in a book I am reading.
"If it had been left to the world to choose a husband for Mary, it would undoubtedly have chosen a rich and talented man. It would not have thought of choosing a virtuous man, a man who from childhood had lived reverently before God. That is not the way the world thinks. Self-interest and purely human considerations are the motivating forces behind most marriages. The possessions which chance bestows rather than the blessings of grace lead to the contracting of marriages. The result is the many marriages between ill-suited partners, each of whom is the others torment. God permits this to happen as an earthly punishment for those who do not consult Him on so important a matter, a matter that can have a deadly outcome if not guided by Him."

I think this passage is right on and that is why our divorce rate is so high, but I do believe that love can conquer all and even if you did not consult God I believe love can still win and that the torment of the other does not have to rule I believe in love winning! Choose to love it is a verb. Put some action to it and do something about it not just this moment or the next, but every moment for the rest of your life. When you feel yourself slipping away or your spouse choose to love more and love better.

Holy Week Missions

For the past 10 years or so I have done some kind of mission work during Holy week. Holy week is just not the same for me and my family without bringing Christ to others and stepping out of the comforts of our home and giving people hope and joy by bringing them Christ. I figure there is no better time than to accompany Christ during these moments we remember his passion and death.
Most of my missions were done in Atlanta going door to door praying with people and accompanying them in their joys and sorrows and bringing them back to the church by making invitations and most of all teaching them more about the love of God. I also went to Mexico in 2003 to do missions and this was one amazing experience. We went into the rural parts of Mexico and traveled by foot from house to house many times speaking few words, but giving lots of smiles, hugs and playing lots of games. It was a life changing experience for me. It is amazing how you give so little and Christ gives you so much. There has not been a mission where I have not received more than I have given. Remember the loaves and fish story in the Gospels...it still happens today every day with each one of us when we give to God the little we have. The little we have is never ever enough because we are so limited, but God asks us give it anyways give it all give it out of love to me and I will multiply I will make it something beautiful! I am deceived by my pride often to think that I have done something great when really I did so little, I gave so little and God made up for the rest and it is only with him and through him that I can ever accomplish anything worthwhile anything really wonderful!
So I decided that we needed to continue with missions here in TN even though I would have to plan them and even though I had not thought it through until the week before Holy week. My family was going to do missions and they would have to be simple. So this is what we did. They were so simple, but they ended up being so beautiful. I began thinking about who we should serve in the community and the word dignity occurred to me...we should go were dignity is lacking in our world. My thought was the elderly, the poor, the unborn! Those are three areas that are so blatantly obvious that our world has no respect and provides no dignity. Our mission to provide dignity where dignity is lacking! So I called a local nursing home and got in touch with the activities coordinator. I proposed to her that a group of kids (I did not have the kids at the time) would act out the Station of the Cross for the community. She did not know what the Stations of the Cross were, but her response was "Well that sounds way better than bingo." They had bingo planned for 3pm on Good Friday, but now we were allowed to come in and perform the Stations of the Cross for the community at 3pm on Good Friday. During Lent every Friday our family does the living Stations of the Cross. At the beginning of Lent Branden took the kids to Home Depot and got the materials to build the cross we would use to do the live Stations every Friday night. It was a grand production every week! The kids loved it and wanted to do it more often than once a week. So I knew at least my kids would know how to act out the Stations now we just needed some more kids so my kids and some big kids to be narrators. It worked out we had about 15 kids to participate in the Stations and we even had Mr. Gill to play the guitar for us and every third station we sang the song where you there when they crucified my Lord. It was beautiful and it did touch many hearts and instead of bingo we were able to bring these people the beauty of Gods love through these little children.
The last thing we did for missions is invited families to gather with us at the abortion clinic in Nashville to pray at 10am on Holy Saturday. We ended up being sick and couldn't go to the mission we planned, but there were families there and there was one story of a woman named Faith that was specifically impacted by a family there praying. She drove into the abortion center parking lot and then drove out and then drove back in and then walked across the street to talk to our friend Angela who has three young boy and her husband Matt was with her. Faith told Angela her story and why she wanted to have an abortion...she was overwhelmed and she had one son with cerebral palsy and his medical bills were expensive...she did not have the energy or money to care for another baby. Angela gave her hope and Faith left the abortion clinic. There is such beauty and grace that comes from praying for the unborn.
Missions are amazing if you don't do them or don't have them around you then start them! They won't only change others lives...they will change yours as well. What I described above was thrown together with a couple phone calls and a couple emails. It did cause me way to much stress when the cross broke before we were supposed to go the nursing home. I tried Brandens different tools but I split a couple pieces of wood and then I resorted to the ever so faithful DUCT TAPE...this stuff never fails! I Love it!

Weakness Incarnate

We carry the treasure of grace in a very weak vessel (2 Cor 4:7), that could shatter when we least expect it. "How many enemies are trying to snatch this treasure from us? Within us, there are the passions we have not sufficiently mastered; outside, the spirit of darkness; around us, a corrupt world. A single inopportune occasion is enough to destroy us. A single glance deprived David of the Lord's love. A Delilah can destroy even a Samson. The holiest pillars have fallen after struggling for many years against violent temptations. When we travel the road of virtue one day does not guarantee the next. (Alexander De Rouville)

These are some lines from a book I am reading that I just fell in love with when reading them. They spoke to my heart and I thought they may speak to yours.

Vegetable Garden

We planted our first garden! It was one of the things I wanted to learn how to do this year and wow is there a lot to learn, but it is such a beautiful thing to do and really brings me closer to God and the beauty of his creations. To have the kids watch little seeds pop up out of the ground and form a plant is really neat. We used some plants and some seeds. We planted all organic fruits and veggies. In the pots we have blueberry bushes. It is amazing to me to watch these plants grow and to know that each one has an optimal way to grow for instance blueberries do the best in acidic soil and once you improve their soil quality the fruits multiply. It is very much like all of our souls and how different each of our paths to holiness is and each one of us has a different kind of soil that is optimal and when we are nurturing and tending to the soil we can to produce great fruits. Another amazing thing with gardening is pruning wow wow wow it is just like you read in the Gospels to get rid of the bad and prune is only to bring more goodness. Initially the pruning makes some of the plants look weak and bear, but after pruning the dead stuff off the plant becomes so much stronger and so much more beautiful none of the nutrients are being wasted any longer! The last little gardening thing is my husband is the best! He helped do most of the work as I nursed, made lemonade, made lunch, changed diapers etc... Tristan and Branden were a great little team and because of them we have a beautiful garden.

No Measuring In Love

A week or so ago I was kissing the kids goodnight and doing the normal talk to them tell them I love them. I normally tell each of them how awesome they are and why they are awesome maybe in a prayer form thanking God for them or just simply telling them. On this particular night I went to Gavin first and told him he was the best boy in the world and he was my favorite in the entire world more special to me than anything. I then stopped in my tracks and thought if I told Gavin this then how could I tell Tristan the very same thing although it was all true once again he is the best boy in the world and he is my favorite in the entire world and more special to me than anything and the same goes for Finn and sweet Annaliese. It became so clear to me that this is how Gods love works. We are each his favorite and he loves us fully 100% completely and we each are the most special to him. Before having multiple children I knew it, but I had never experienced or felt it and in this moment I felt in and the Holy Spirit let me know it. He made it so clear to me that there is no measuring spoon or equality in love from God. He does not choose to love one soul more than another we are loved to the amount that is perfect for each of us. Just as a handicapped child might need more years and more intensive tending to does not mean they are loved more by a mother, just differently. Each of us is so unique and God loves us so uniquely and perfectly. God does not divide out his love into equal parts. We try to imagine God in our human capacity and understand his love within our human capacity, but with love 1+1 doesn't = 2 only when we go beyond the binds of our humanness and allow God to love us the way he wants in whatever capacity that may be only then will we begin to understand that we can't look at our neighbor who seems so blessed or look at our other neighbor who seems to have a huge cross to bear and it doesn't seem to get better. Don't look beyond yourself just allow God to love you uniquely and perfectly and you will bloom wherever he plants you in the good times and in the hard times. God loves you the most and thinks you truly are the best and his favorite! The more we allow God to love us and the more we respond to his love the more we will begin to see the many times he is loving us from the big to the very small blessings happening each and every moment of our lives.